Family Guy Stewie Quotes

Stewie from Family Guy (to Jeremy, the babysitter's boyfriend):
Ha! I got your hat! Take that, hatless! Now go back to the quad and resume your hackey sac tourney! I'm not gonna lay down for some frat boy bastard with his damn Teva sandals and his Skoal Bandits and his Abercrombie and Fitch long sleeved, open stitched, crew neck Henley smoking his sticky buds out of a soda can while watching his favorite downloaded Simpsons episodes every night! Yes, we all love "Mr. Plow"! Oh, you've got the song memorized, do you? SO DOES EVERYONE ELSE! That is exactly the kind of idiot you see at Taco Bell at 1 in the morning! The guy who just whiffed his way down the bar skank ladder!
Family Guy, Stewie from Family Guy Quotes

Stewie from Family Guy (to one of the prostitutes at Cleveland's house):
So, is there any tread left on the tires? Or at this point would it be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway?
Family Guy Stewie Quotes